I am often amused when I see relationship statuses on Facebook that say, ‘its complicated’. At first glance I am intrigued and wonder what exactly does this person mean by ‘its complicated? However, after giving it some thought I soon realise that all relationships are complicated. How can they not be complicated when you have very unique individuals coming together. I have never had a pet, but I assume that a relationship with an animal is a lot easier.

It is often due to the complexities of relationships that most people tend to avoid them. But is that really a good idea?  In Proverbs 18:2 we see that a man who isolates himself…….rages against all wise judgment. Whilst in 1 Corinthians 5:11 we are advised to stay away from certain people even if they are believers. This clearly shows that we are not obligated to be embrace everybody, but neither can we isolate ourselves from living in community. 

I’ve met some fascinating people on my journey, some have come for a reason and others only for a season. In this I have learned to value those whom God has placed in my life and also learned to distance myself from those who were just along for the ride. So I say to you, if the relationship has no value and purpose in it, cut it off. But if you desire to grow into you full potential, meaningful relationships are essential.

Proverbs 27:17 “As iron sharpens iron, so the countenance of one person sharpens another.”  

Being ‘sharp’ is very appealing, but as you can see, the process is not. It will involve filing, grinding and friction of all sorts, you can be that sure sparks are gonna fly. However, once the process is complete, the results are well worth the pain and discomfort.

With that in  mind I would like to share with you 3 essential relationships needed for growth into your full potential. 

A Mentor

By definition, a mentor is an experienced and trusted adviser. The key words here are experience and trust. In order to grow into your full potential it is imperative to have the council of someone that you can trust who has been successful in the area that you desire to succeed in.                                    

(For more on metorshiop read my blog DON’T REINVENT THE WHEEL: GET A MENTOR )

A Peer

By definition, a peer is a person equal to another in abilities, qualifications, age, background and social status.  We all need a trusted friend who understands our context and is able to spur us on in the achievement of our dreams. A friend who can correct us when we miss it and applaud us when we get it right. Basically, a peer is somebody on the same level as us and on a similar journey.

A Protege 

Thirdly in our list of relationship essentials, we need a protege. A protege is a person who is guided and supported by an older and more experienced individual. He/she is someone we invest in purely for their growth and development. Too often, many ambitious people only want to be in relationship with people that will benefit them, never taking time to ‘give back’ to the next generation. There is always a reward in giving, its pleasantly surprising to see how much a protege can challenge and provoke a mentor to greater heights.

Kingdom minded people know the importance of setting up the next generation. Look at king David for example, he was forbidden from building the temple, but that did not stop him from gathering the necessary resources for Solomon to complete it.


 We cannot reach our full potential in isolation. Nothing happens in a vacuum. The fulfilment of destiny will require us walking it out with others. We need the help of those ahead of us, the camaraderie of those beside us and the unselfishness to build into those coming after us.

Much Love to all!